August 21, 2012
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hidden abilities i've discovered that come easily to me:
writing
playing scrabble
fundraising
i am thankful for the people God gave to love me. i reflect on my relationships - and i have such a good handful of them that are deep and loyal and true. i am spoiled beyond spoiled.
i really need to get a grip on everything that's happening with school. i cannot be all lazy with this as if how things proceed are unimportant - as i treat many things in my life. no, this is serious business and i need to treat it as i treat agape and God's work, where i am on top of things 5000%.
i need to wake up earlier, be more purposeful with my last few days.
when i almost committed myself to go to india for long-term mission work, rev billy told me that this was not me giving up my all for Jesus but only the beginning - that there will be more continuous things to give up, to die to myself. after having mentally discarded my life of luxury, those words were surprising to hear and i still ponder them. what i am doing now is no great feat. but i do not think of it as a beginning - pastor aaron says it is a continuance. i keep going since the moment i was reborn; i keep learning, i keep growing. it is interesting to consider how as my physical body has begun the process of deterioration towards death (yay 30), that my spiritual attachment to the world will also (hopefully) gradually deteriorate. then, when the time comes for God to take me home, i will already be completely ready to go.
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