March 12, 2012

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  i am so. very.

   

  friends are an idol for me for sure.

  the feeling of being loved is an idol for me for sure.

  when i feel unloved, the hurt is so great i would rather chuck the whole friendship into the fire

  and start anew with others

   

  i am good at starting anew

  that's why i feel like i don't need to keep anyone

   

  i can start anew, go straight into deep zone zero core closeness

  and then when heart hurts, go away.

   

  i think i probably cause a lot of hurt this way.

  but it is because the hurt i feel runs so deep

  probably connecting with past experiences that have left weak spots in my heart

   

  bleh.

   

  the emo-ness keeps me close to God.

   

   

  • 10:39 am
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